AI
Salesforce Buys Informatica to Build an AI That Actually Knows What It’s Talking About
Salesforce just spent $8B to make its AI agents slightly less clueless — with Informatica’s help.
Enterprise Tech
Unframe Raises $50M to Solve Enterprise AI
Fresh out of stealth and $50 million richer, this Cupertino-based startup wants to “turnkey” your enterprise AI into existence in “hours, not months,” like a meal kit for CTOs who forgot how to cook.
AI
This Week in Snark: From Pebble’s Resurrection to Nvidia’s AI Empire
From AI CEOs to dead wearables crawling back from the grave, this week’s Silicon Snark round-up is a blend of quantum ambition, GPU domination, and just a touch of dystopia.
Enterprise Tech
Meet Welinq: The Startup Quietly Building Quantum’s AWS
Enter Welinq, a company you’ve probably never heard of but now should, because they’ve just launched the first commercial quantum memory designed specifically for quantum data centers.
Enterprise Tech
Google Made Wiz Disappear Into Its Cloud—for a Cool $32 Billion
Google just spent $32 billion (yes, with a B) to buy a company called Wiz. Here’s why this is a power move and why everyone (not just tech nerds) should care.
Satire
Silicon Dreams and Holographic Schemes: A Poetic Prelude to the NVIDIA GTC Keynote
On the eve of the NVIDIA GTC keynote, as the tech world holds its breath for Jensen Huang’s next big reveal, the air crackles with anticipation. Here’s a poem to capture the excitement.
AI
NVIDIA: Let’s Talk Tokens Instead of GPUs
NVIDIA has graciously blessed us with a deep and thoughtful discourse on tokens. Yes, tokens—those tiny little chunks of data that AI models use to think.
Enterprise Tech
UiPath Acquires Peak, Achieves Peak Agentic Buzzword Usage
Yesterday evening after you signed off from work, they announced their acquisition of Peak, a company that specializes in "agentic solutions" (which definitely doesn’t just mean AI automation with extra steps).
AI
AI CEO, AI Board, AI Employees: OpenAI's Fully-Automated Enterprise Is Finally Here!
With the launch of their new OpenAI Responses API, integrated web search, file search, and even computer use capabilities, we’re just a few updates away from the ultimate corporate utopia: an enterprise run entirely by AI agents.
Enterprise Tech
Asana’s CEO is Retiring, But Don’t Worry—We Made Him a Task Board for That
After nearly 17 years of checking off tasks, color-coding projects, and making sure everyone on his team hit those OKRs, Asana co-founder and CEO Dustin Moskovitz has finally decided it’s time to mark one last task complete: retiring from the top job.
Funding
Turing’s $111M Series E: When in Doubt, Just Say "AGI"
Turing secures $111M to advance AGI, or as we like to call it, ‘the perpetual AI fundraising machine.’ Investors just can’t resist those glowing red eyes.
Mobile World Congress
Huawei’s MWC Takeover Continues: Now With 100% More RAMS and GIGA+
What does this even mean? Huawei Releases the ISP Business Success Driven by RAMS White Paper and GIGA+ Global Online Showcase.