DeepSeek Nears $12 Billion in Funding. Cheap AI Has Expensive Parents.

DeepSeek reportedly nears a $12 billion round backed by Tencent and CATL. Cheap tokens are real; a cheap AI business is another question.

JBL Built a Boat Subwoofer That Detaches for Shore Leave

JBL’s BassPro Go2 is a boat subwoofer that becomes a portable speaker. The engineering is clever; the missing price is doing suspiciously heavy lifting.

SiliconSnark’s AI Music Revenue Tops 200x Its Penny Investment. Please Ignore Expenses.

SiliconSnark’s AI albums have earned over 200 times its $0.01 Cents.VC investment. Introducing supersnark hypergrowth. Kindly disregard Ghost and distribution.

Evident Buys CrestOptics to Give Biology Better Lighting and Fewer Excuses

Evident acquired CrestOptics on October 5, expanding live-cell microscopy. Its Needham operation links Boston biotech to a global scientific tools deal.

Modern Treasury Seeks a Bank Charter for the Money Between API Calls

Modern Treasury seeks a national trust bank charter for digital asset custody. What the application changes for stablecoin payments, customers, and risk.

OpenAI Plans Ads Beside ChatGPT Images. Your Imaginary Kitchen Has a Sponsor.

OpenAI plans visual ads beside ChatGPT image generation. The measurement tools look useful; keeping imagination separate from shopping is the harder test.

NACON Put a Screen on a PS5 Controller. Your Buttons Needed Management.

NACON’s $229.99 Revolution 5 Unlimited puts a screen, TMR sticks, and six extra buttons on a PS5 controller. Smart, excessive, and almost convincing.

OPPO F35 Turns the Group Selfie Into a Six-Year Commitment

OPPO’s F35 series combines a 50MP ultrawide selfie camera, 8,000mAh battery, and six-year promises. Your group chat may not last as long.

This Week in Snark: Plush Governance, $650 Rent Parties, and Sam and Dario's Breakup Duet

This week, AI got a stuffed-animal board, a $200 million velvet rope, and a congressional letter about its keys. Then it got a music video. Priorities, people.

SF Tech Week 2026 Turns San Francisco Into a Pitch Deck You Can Walk Through

SF Tech Week 2026 runs October 5–11. Explore the events, AI hype, robots, networking traps, and Boston comparisons before your calendar files for bankruptcy.

8BitDo Turned a Gaming Keyboard Into a Tiny Gears of War Memorial

8BitDo’s Gears of War: E-Day keyboard and mouse are smart, capable, and gloriously overcommitted to desk-based military history.

Neurable Put a Brain Battery Inside $499 Headphones. Please Recharge Yourself.

Neurable One puts 12 EEG sensors and a ‘Brain Battery’ in $499 headphones. The focus tech is clever; the cognitive dashboard needs humility.