Microsoft - SiliconSnark

SiliconSnark robot checks an electricity receipt beside a Maia 300 rack styled as a restaurant kitchen.

Microsoft Gives Maia 300 the Copilot Bill. The Megawatts Still Apply.

Microsoft’s Maia 300 promises more AI output per megawatt in 2027. A serious efficiency bet, with benchmark caveats and no promise of a smaller bill.

Three AI companies toast Astra over hidden contracts while SiliconSnark’s yellow robot holds a GPU and stapler.

Deep Dive

Deep Dive: NVIDIA and Microsoft Celebrate OpenAI’s Astra Launch With Their Prenups Open

NVIDIA and Microsoft are cheering OpenAI’s GPT-6 Astra after a tense 2026. Follow the chips, cloud contracts, and rival bets behind AI’s awkward group hug.

Guides

The Definitive 2026 Guide to GPTs, Claude, Gemini, Grok, and Friends

A November 2026 guide to ChatGPT, Claude, Gemini, Grok, open models, API prices, coding agents, privacy, and choosing AI that actually finishes the job.

SiliconSnark’s mustard-yellow robot inspects Mistral and Microsoft servers behind a European firewall.

Microsoft Is Spending Billions to Put Mistral AI Behind Europe’s Firewall

Microsoft is funding Mistral’s European AI expansion, making “sovereign AI” less a slogan and more a very expensive deployment option.

SiliconSnark robot reviews a giant AI infrastructure bill inside a glowing Microsoft data center.

Deep Dive

Deep Dive: Microsoft’s AI Strategy Has Azure, Copilot, OpenAI, and One Giant Bill

Microsoft remains an AI leader, but OpenAI tensions, huge capex, Copilot pressure, and investor doubt are reshaping its 2026 AI strategy.

The SiliconSnark robot reads a breakup letter at a candlelit table, with an empty chair labeled "Azure Exclusivity,"

Big Tech

Microsoft and OpenAI Are Now 'Official but Non-Exclusive.' The AGI Clause Got a Quiet Funeral.

After five years of exclusivity, Microsoft and OpenAI just announced an open relationship. They also buried the clause about what happens when AI becomes smarter than us. No big deal.

The SiliconSnark robot presents a three-step slide at the MAI Superintelligence Launch Event

Big Tech

Microsoft's Superintelligence Team Has Arrived—They Made a Transcription Tool

Microsoft launched a 'MAI Superintelligence' team six months ago to achieve AI self-sufficiency from OpenAI. Today's debut: a speech-to-text model. The countdown continues.

SiliconSnark robot explaining wearable health data in a chaotic AI-powered clinic

Launch

Microsoft Copilot Health: AI Will Now Calmly Explain Why Your Wearable Says You’re Dying

Microsoft just launched Copilot Health, an AI designed to analyze your wearables, lab tests, and medical records. The goal: explain your health. The internet’s reaction: cautiously curious.

Cartoon SiliconSnark robot juggling alphabet soup cans labeled Series A–K while drowning in Apple press releases under a giant “MOU Basically Nothing” and “Unindexed” stamp.

This Week in Snark

This Week in Snark: Apple’s Avalanche of Launches, Databricks’ Alphabet Soup, and Microsoft’s Empty Promises

This Week in Snark: Microsoft’s empty MOU, Apple’s press release flood, Databricks’ Series K, and Google censoring our funniest articles.

Cartoon SiliconSnark robot staring at a tiny 47-word Microsoft–OpenAI press release on a giant screen.

Microsoft and OpenAI Announce a Memorandum of Understanding, Which Is Fancy Talk for “We’ll Get Back to You Later”

Microsoft and OpenAI announced a non-binding MOU with just 47 words — here’s an 800-word snarky breakdown of what the shortest press release in tech history really means.

Cartoon wave of tech crashes over worker while SiliconSnark robot surfs with a megaphone.

This Week in Snark

This Week in Snark: AI Avalanche, Designer Babies, and One Extremely Loud Soundbar

A week packed with AI announcements, design bromances, and sonic overcompensation.

Satire

Farewell, Skype: The Rise, Fall, and Glorious Lag of a Once-Great App

It is with a mix of nostalgia and profound indifference that we gather here today to mourn Skype's slow, painful, and utterly predictable demise.