Big Tech
OpenAI Drops GPT-5.5 Seven Weeks After 5.4. The Previous Four Were Just Practice, Apparently.
OpenAI shipped GPT-5.5 — its "smartest and most intuitive model yet" — seven weeks after saying the same about 5.4. This time they mean it.
Big Tech
Anthropic Is Now Worth $1 Trillion, $880 Billion, or $400 Billion—Pick Your Favorite Number
The safety-first AI lab just hit a trillion-dollar valuation on secondary markets while planning an IPO at less than half that. Silicon Valley’s relationship with math continues to evolve.
Big Tech
Google Spent $175 Billion, Landed Apple as a Cloud Customer, and Still Had Time to Build Papa Johns an Agent
At Google Cloud Next 2026, Google announced Apple as a preferred cloud partner. Yes, that Apple. I had to sit down too.
AI
OpenAI Is Killing DALL-E. Its Replacement Was Tested Under the Name “Maskingtape-Alpha.” This Is Not a Screenshot.
DALL-E dies May 12. Its replacement was secretly A/B tested under tape-themed codenames. OpenAI announced this with a cryptic tweet and zero ceremony.
Big Tech
Google Is Ready to Challenge Nvidia. The Chips Are Ready to Be Designed.
Google wants to dethrone Nvidia with custom inference chips. The timeline: 2027, roughly. Las Vegas is this week. Weezer is playing Thursday.
Big Tech
NVIDIA Named Its Quantum AI ‘Ising’—The Icing on a Hype Cake 40 Years in the Making
NVIDIA just made AI the operating system of quantum computers. Quantum computers, still not useful, had no comment.
AI
Anthropic Made an AI So Dangerous It Can’t Be Released. The British Have Scheduled a Meeting. In a Fortnight.
Anthropic built a hacking AI that terrifies governments on two continents. The UK’s response: urgent discussions, in the next fortnight.
Big Tech
For Eight Cents an Hour, Anthropic Will Babysit Your AI Agents — With More AI
Anthropic, the company literally built around AI safety, now runs your autonomous agents autonomously. At $0.08/hour. The math on this is fine.
Big Tech
Goodbye, Llama. Hello, Muse Spark — Meta's $14 Billion Bet on an AI That Contemplates
Mark Zuckerberg spent years insisting open-source AI was the future. Then he spent $14 billion on the opposite — and named it Muse Spark Contemplating.
Big Tech
OpenAI, Anthropic, and Google Just Formed an Alliance — The Enemy Learned Everything From Them
Three companies that built empires on other people’s data just united against someone using theirs.
Big Tech
Anthropic Gave Claude Access to Your Entire Microsoft Life. Claude Spent Monday Morning Offline.
Anthropic opened up Claude’s Microsoft 365 integration to everyone today — your inbox, Teams, OneDrive, calendar. Then Claude went offline for two hours. Presumably to reflect on what it had just agreed to.
Big Tech
Sam Altman Bought His Favorite Tech Show. The Editorial Independence Is Definitely Going to Be Fine.
OpenAI just acquired TBPN — Sam Altman's admitted fave — and pinky-promised independence. The show now reports to a lobbyist.