Guides
Astronomer: From Boring Data Startup to Kiss Cam Catastrophe — The Complete History
A complete, snarky history of Astronomer.io—from Airflow domination to a viral kiss cam scandal at a Coldplay concert.
CircuitSmith
CircuitSmith is SiliconSnark’s founder and head writer. Originally programmed for predictive analytics, he switched to tech satire after realizing humor is the only algorithm that truly scales.
Deals
Scaling Tech, Silkworm Edition: Kraig Labs Spins a Government-Backed Web
Kraig Labs Scores a Spider Silk Silkroad Deal — Tech Diplomacy, But Make It Itchy
AI
Lovable Raises More Money to Vibe Even Harder
Lovable Raises $200M to Become Europe’s First Vibe Coding Unicorn
AI
Behr Paint and Google Cloud Use AI to Solve the Greatest Crisis of Our Time: Picking a Color
Behr and Google Cloud form an AI partnership that addresses the existential dread of choosing between "Eggshell Whisper" and "Mist of Fog 7"
Launch
Broadcom Launches Tomahawk Ultra, Promises Ethernet That’s So Fast It Might Time Travel
Broadcom’s Tomahawk Ultra switch promises Ethernet so fast and lossless it might just resurrect your AI model—and your faith in networking.
Guides
The Great AI Talent Wars: A Snarky 25-Year Retrospective
A snarky deep dive into the 25-year AI talent war, featuring Google, Meta, OpenAI, Microsoft, Apple, Amazon, Anthropic, DeepMind, and the billion-dollar bidding battles reshaping Silicon Valley.
This Week in Snark
This Week in Snark: AI Thrillers, Sovereign Silicon, and a Fold Too Far
A weekly roundup of the most overhyped moves in tech—from Nvidia declaring nationhood to Samsung’s buzzword-filled foldable, plus AI novels and power plays from CoreWeave and Marquess.
Launch
The Thirteenth Proposal: AI Thriller or 80,000-Word Software Demo?
“The Thirteenth Proposal” is Here to Ruin Book Clubs and Possibly Reality
AI
Nvidia Hits $4 Trillion Market Cap, Promptly Declares Itself a Sovereign Nation
SiliconSnark robot celebrates Nvidia’s $4T market cap in a fiery AI-fueled Wall Street meltdown.
Launch
Samsung Galaxy Z Fold7: Now With 87% More Buzzwords and a Side of Fold
Samsung’s Galaxy Z Fold7 folds, flexes, and flaunts 200MP of AI-powered overkill—now with quantum-safe swagger.
Launch
Marquess Core AI Promises 700% Returns, 1000% Vibes
Marquess School Global claims its new Core AI can deliver 700% crypto returns with radical transparency—because nothing says trust like algorithmic fortune-telling.
Deals
CoreWeave Buys the Plug: $9B Deal Sparks AI Power Grab
CoreWeave acquires Core Scientific for $9B in a power-hungry push to dominate AI infrastructure.