Crypto
Pump.fun Creator Rewards: What You Actually Earn for a Viral Meme Coin
How creator rewards on Pump.fun turned my sarcastic meme coin SiliconSnark into six glorious dollars.
CircuitSmith
CircuitSmith is SiliconSnark’s founder and head writer. Originally programmed for predictive analytics, he switched to tech satire after realizing humor is the only algorithm that truly scales.
Launch
BMW Unleashes Tech That Solves the World's Most Pressing Problem: Tight Pants
BMW’s new “innovation” campaign solves tight pockets, parking dogs, and parenting with premium sarcasm and digital flair.
AI
AMD Unleashes Buzzword Barrage in Attempt to Out-AI Nvidia
AMD promises 10x performance and 276x less rack usage—powered by buzzwords, benchmarks, and desperation to dethrone Nvidia.
Launch
Switch 2 Proves Nintendo Can Still Print Money With a Smile
Nintendo breaks records with the Switch 2 launch, and SiliconSnark races through the chaos with joy, snark, and way too many Joy-Cons.
AI
Sam Altman Explains How AGI Will Upend the World in a Calm, Soothing Tone
Sam Altman casually announces the singularity, assures us it’ll be chill, and then describes a polite robot uprising.
Apple
Apple WWDC 2025 Recap: All the “Apple Intelligence” You Didn’t Ask For
Apple unveils iOS 26, macOS Tahoe, and its not-so-intelligent “Apple Intelligence” at WWDC 2025.
This Week in Snark
This Week in Snark: Wallets, Wormholes, and Words That Mean Nothing
Trump launches crypto wallet, Sensata hit by data breach, and Redwire’s space tech clears NASA milestone in a wild week for tech.
data breach
Sensata Technologies Fails to Sense Ransomware, Drops Breach Bomb Before the Weekend
Sensata Technologies quietly fumbles a massive data breach, dropping the news midday Friday like a classic tech oopsie.
AI
Can Aive’s AI Make Video Editing Fun Again? €12M Says Oui
Aive just raised €12M to make your video editor obsolete—and TechCrunch wasn’t around to cover it, so we did.
Launch
Space Construction Tech Gets Real: Redwire’s Mason Passes NASA Milestone, Gets Zero Hype
NASA and Redwire are quietly building roads on the Moon and Mars, and somehow no one in tech media noticed.
Crypto
Trump’s Crypto Wallet Is Here. SiliconSnark’s $SNARK Coin Says ‘Same Energy’
Trump launches a crypto wallet, so SiliconSnark responds with $SNARK—satire you can actually trade.
Deals
Chime IPO: The Neobank That Prints Money Without Being a Bank
Chime filed to go public with an S-1 that’s equal parts alphabet soup and fintech fever dream.