Satire
The Letter Groq Should Have Sent to the Employees Left Behind After the Nvidia Deal
Groq’s Nvidia deal made headlines—but many employees were left behind. A snarky imagined letter explains how modern “exits” really work.
Deals
Deals
The $6–7 Million Startup Club: Every U.S. Startup That Raised Between $6–7M in 2025
A snarky deep dive into every U.S. startup that raised $6–7 million in 2025, inspired by the viral 6–7 meme and tech’s most honest funding tier.
Deals
Trump Media Discovers Fusion Power, Declares It Key to America’s A.I. Dominance
Trump Media is merging with fusion startup TAE in a $6B deal promising energy abundance, A.I. dominance, and a power plant by 2026.
Deals
iRobot Files for Chapter 11 and Calls It a Growth Plan
iRobot announced a “strategic transaction." Translation: Chapter 11, wiped-out shareholders, and a quiet reboot for a Boston tech icon.
Deals
WTW Acquires Newfront: A $1.3B Shortcut to Pretending It’s a Tech Company
Inside WTW’s $1.3B Newfront acquisition and its big bet on agentic AI, tech shortcuts, and insurance’s latest attempt at innovation.
Deals
As OpenAI and Google Battle It Out, Anthropic Secures a $200M AI Alliance
Anthropic expands its enterprise push with a $200M Snowflake partnership, bringing Claude-powered AI agents to 12,600 global customers and quietly positioning itself for the AI crown.
Deals
Kalshi Hits $11B Valuation, So SiliconSnark Invented Even More Addictive Startup Ideas
Kalshi doubles to an $11B valuation, highlighting tech’s addiction economy. SiliconSnark responds with satirical startup ideas built for pure dopamine.
Deals
Eon Raises $300M and Hijacks re:Invent Week With the Boldest Cloud Announcement of 2025
There are bold moves in tech, and then there’s announcing a $300 million cloud infrastructure round during AWS re:Invent, the one week a year when every cloud reporter, analyst, influencer, and corporate-logo-hoodie enjoyer is physically trapped in a Vegas convention center staring at slide decks about throughput. While
Deals
Warner Music Just Hit ‘Play’ on the Future of AI Music — And Suno, the Boston Darling, Is Finally Getting Its Spotlight
Warner Music Group and Boston-based Suno strike a groundbreaking licensed AI music partnership, giving artists control and new revenue while redefining how music is created, shared, and discovered.
Deals
Ursa Major Grabs $100M To Build Hypersonics Faster Than the Pentagon Can Blink
Ursa Major raises $100M to scale hypersonics and rocket motors, accelerating America’s defense tech race with record bookings and real manufacturing power.
Deals
Cursor Raises $2.3B to Replace Developers With Productivity Gains
Cursor secures $2.3B to expand its AI coding tools, hitting a $29.3B valuation as enterprise demand and developer adoption surge.
Deals
AirIQ’s Tiny Tech Takeover: Inside the $850K IoT “Strategic Acquisition” That’s Smaller Than a Seed Round
AirIQ’s $850,000 “strategic acquisition” adds 1,000 IoT devices and a handful of customers. This deal that proves growth is relative in the Internet of Things.