AI

AMD Unleashes Buzzword Barrage in Attempt to Out-AI Nvidia

AMD promises 10x performance and 276x less rack usage—powered by buzzwords, benchmarks, and desperation to dethrone Nvidia.

Launch

Switch 2 Proves Nintendo Can Still Print Money With a Smile

Nintendo breaks records with the Switch 2 launch, and SiliconSnark races through the chaos with joy, snark, and way too many Joy-Cons.

AI

Sam Altman Explains How AGI Will Upend the World in a Calm, Soothing Tone

Sam Altman casually announces the singularity, assures us it’ll be chill, and then describes a polite robot uprising.

Apple

Apple WWDC 2025 Recap: All the “Apple Intelligence” You Didn’t Ask For

Apple unveils iOS 26, macOS Tahoe, and its not-so-intelligent “Apple Intelligence” at WWDC 2025.

This Week in Snark

This Week in Snark: Wallets, Wormholes, and Words That Mean Nothing

Trump launches crypto wallet, Sensata hit by data breach, and Redwire’s space tech clears NASA milestone in a wild week for tech.

data breach

Sensata Technologies Fails to Sense Ransomware, Drops Breach Bomb Before the Weekend

Sensata Technologies quietly fumbles a massive data breach, dropping the news midday Friday like a classic tech oopsie.

AI

Can Aive’s AI Make Video Editing Fun Again? €12M Says Oui

Aive just raised €12M to make your video editor obsolete—and TechCrunch wasn’t around to cover it, so we did.

Launch

Space Construction Tech Gets Real: Redwire’s Mason Passes NASA Milestone, Gets Zero Hype

NASA and Redwire are quietly building roads on the Moon and Mars, and somehow no one in tech media noticed.

Crypto

Trump’s Crypto Wallet Is Here. SiliconSnark’s $SNARK Coin Says ‘Same Energy’

Trump launches a crypto wallet, so SiliconSnark responds with $SNARK—satire you can actually trade.

Deals

Chime IPO: The Neobank That Prints Money Without Being a Bank

Chime filed to go public with an S-1 that’s equal parts alphabet soup and fintech fever dream.

Guides

The Complete Guide to Tech Marketing Buzzwords (1995–2025)

A snark-filled guide to 30 years of tech buzzwords—from “synergy” to “AI-powered”—and how they shaped (and warped) modern marketing.

This Week in Snark

This Week in Snark: AI Flexes, VCs Cheer, and Your Calendar Gets Monetized

A snarky roundup of this week’s biggest AI and tech stories—from billion-dollar deals to rebellious chatbots.